Twist of Fate
by heavenfira
Summary: I'm up to second part of the story, in Honinbo Shusaku life time the Edo era. Torajirou (incaination of Hikaru) finally met Shuwa (incaination of Akira).
1. Default Chapter

Hi, this is my first Hikaru no Go fanfiction. Thank for reading it and sorry if there are any grammars error.

Disclaimer: Hikaru no Go is not belong to me. 

Prologue 

I really hate Fujiwara no Sai. His pretty girlish face does not help my wrath either. I remember the first day he débuted in the Heina Court. He was presented to the Emperor by his uncle, the power behind the throne. Fujiwara Sai was asked to play an Igo game from the Emperor, it was expected. He wins, only a moku but there was no doubt that his strength is stronger. My gut twisted when his eyes fell upon me. 

He looks like those spoiled children (born with silver spoon) from powerful clan but there is something more, a spiritual soul lurks behind his dark greyish blue eyes. I realized that he have everything I have worked hard all my live and even when I died I would never be his equal. 

He is like a child that innocent to the scheming of the court but than Igo were his foremost thoughts. I'm envious of him but I will never say it aloud. I watched him growing popular everyday with the other lords and ladies. He's fitted in the court life without conniving and that made me to hate him more. 

Whenever his eyes gazed on me, it reflects my own soul and I can see all that is evil and vile that I has become over the years. I wanted to pluck his eyes out so I don't have to see my true self and thus I could continue to lie to myself.

Finally I have enough, especially what I had witness yesterday morning. He have to die or to be humiliate. That its! It is the only ways I could have my peace back. 

TBC. 

If possible please review. Thanks. 


	2. Chapter 1: Tsuyujima Hi

Don't kill me, I know what I write will offense you…I offense myself (Hi being Tsuyujima'son). 

P.S. I'm not really sure about the name of the cheater who frame Sai but I read it somewhere so I use it. If you know the name then please inform me. Thanks.

Chapter One: Tsuyujima Hi 

My father is a Go instructor to the Emperor and I'm proud of him. He is the best Father anyone can ask for even through he a bit scary at the time. I remembered once time when I accident stumble on the scene where he whips a servant so cruelly, the servant body is sagged on the floor like block of wood. He stopped when he saw me at the door and dismisses everyone insight, quickly the servant scram off leaving a monster that look like my father and me alone. I was shocked and my distasted of what has occur appeared on my eyes, he hold me and reassure that he is sorry to lost control and will not doing it again even the servants commit murder. I trust his promised; after all he never broke one to me before.

I never witness such act again but I have this feeling that everything was not appeared as it is. Life at the Court is busy; I spend much my time with the crown prince and his small court (friends). 

"Tsuyujima san, your poem is really good. Can you help me? Otani sensei speak to my father on the other day and I'm ground until my school work is better." The small boy throws the straws ball back to his companion.

"Why you asked Tsuyujima san? I can help you Suzuki san." A skinny slim boy pouted,  

"Otani sensei said that Tsuyujima san is talent…"Suzuki did not see the ball throwing his way and it smack into his face then bounce off across the path garden. The group eyes on the ball to see where it land and surprise to see where it stop, it roll off before a young man feet that they have never see before. His face is beautiful and he looks elegant than a girl does. 

The Crown Prince recognize the stranger and called aloud,

"Cousin Sai could you please return our ball."

I watched the man walk up to them graceful and the smile of his face like sunshine. My name fit him more than I do. In that moment I just knew that he is my Sun from now to eternity. 

 I was too busy memorized his face to listen to anything around me, when the Crown Prince said my name that I snapped back to reality and relies that he introduce Sai to me,

"Hajimemashite Fujiwara san. Doozo yoroshiku!" he smiles at me warmly and the rest is history. 

Years pass by quickly, Sai and I become close friend. After classes I often off to see Sai and watched his Game with the other Courtiers. I never told my father about Sai after that incident when I mention Sai name. He face looks weird and his breaths become shorter, I thought he going to have a heart attacked and change the subject quickly. I found out later that he considers Sai his rival because both of them are the Emperor's Go instructors. There is a silent war between them, properly on my father side. Sai does not care for this; he just loved to play Go. 

I chosen to be a samurai instead of become a scholar, I like the outside door too much. The other reason I do not like to mention, being disrespectful about the Father whom I love. I do not wish to follow his footstep. May be I seeing him through an adult view but he is still my father and he is strong in Go as my friend Sai. 

~~~~~~ (Present)

"Good morning, Sai" I cheerful wave my hand to beck him over. 

"Good morning Hi!" he gives a brightest smiles and pulling me toward the small pond,

"Yesterday you told me to come you here. Why so secrecy?" Sai arm is wrapped around me like a child. He did not change at all through the year, more beautiful perhaps I sigh.

"I'm leaving tomorrow Sai…" I replied

"What? You didn't mention any of this before" Sai complains,

"I has my order from the General Tanaka yesterday and you're too busy with your Go." I picked up the rock and throw it across the tranquil water surface. 

"I'm sorry Hi. You look worried yesterday." Sai nodded guiltily,

"I'll be fine of course, actually I really excited about this Sai. My first mission and it is part of my training to become a Samurai." I hold the rock tighter in my palm. I can felt a stingy tear from my eyes, for some reason I have the bad feeling about this. This will be my last time seeing him. 

"Hey Hi, what are you thinking? You look so sad." His hand snuggled my arm.

I just stared at him; I could not tell him that I feel I may be kill in battle with those bandit raiders because it would only the reason why I had this bad omen that I will separate from him. 

"I don't want to left you behind Sai, I want to be with you forever!" at last the words come out. I have to say it. Yes I love him, he is everything to me, he is more important than my life or anything that I ever hold dear. 

"I feels that way too Hi." he give a sunny smile and wrapped me in his arms. We did not speak after that because words are no longer is needed. How long we stood there, I do not know but my face pale when my eyes met my Father, standing a few feet away. 

TBC. 

If you not guess by now: Hikaru is the reincaination of Tsuyujima Hi


	3. Chapter 2: Hail the Hero

Chapter 2: Hail the Hero 

"Kyoto is beautiful as always." I murmured to myself. I am happy to be home after spend months chased the bandits. The meals was cold, the ground is too harsh to sleep but most of all I missed Sai. Yes! Return home means returning to Sai side.  

I feel triumph and proud to be a samurai when I saw the street are flock with people, standing sideway and cheers us on. I noticed my horse snorted out loud as if he too understands what happening around him. It quite amusing but my eyes keeps straying off, searching the crowd for Sai as he has promise. I was disappointed but reassure myself that may be the Emperor order him to stayed with the other Courtiers. 

My steps quickly entering the Royal Chamber, where the Emperor meets his Court everyday. My Commander stand ahead of me and we both kneels down and bows respectful as the custom dictated. Greeting exchanges between them allowed my eyes to wander off looking for Sai. My heart squeezed tightly when I found no sign of him anywhere. I knew then that he had gone. I was right after all; instead of my life it was his that Fate takes away. I felt the whole room spinning and collapsed on the floor. 

"Tsuyujima-sama, you've awaked." The girl- servant exclaimed, I look at her wearily as memory flood back. My face pale as I tried to get up,

"Sai, I must see him!" 

"You can't get up. The doctor orders you to have a few days rest at least, Tsuyujima-sama." The girl tried to prevent me move off the mattress, my eyebrows rose indicated that she have over step her boundary. 

She blushed, turned away and continues to speak,

"You must rest, your father wishes to speak to you as soon you awake. I'll go and get him now." My hand reaches out to stop her that is the last thing I wanted.

"No, I don't want to see him now." I give a sigh. "What's your name?" my question shocks her but I wanted her helps.

" My name is Hona Kiko, Tsuyujima-sama."      

"Kiko, how long have you been working here?" I asked, tried to charm her.

"I have been work in the palace for a year now." She mumbles before answering aloud. I give her a bright smile and said, "I've not see you before." I tried to remember if I met her before but the headache is so bad that to continue thinking is futile.

"I was working in the kitchen until last month and promote to house work, Tsuyujima-sama." 

I only nodded, tired suddenly. I want to close my eyes and drip off to sleep again but a nagging thought hovel over me and Sai face appear in my mind.

"Sai!" I whispered,

"?"

"Kiko, can you go to get Sai for me please. I want to see him before I close my eyes." 

_"I want to be sure that he is still alive." _My thought finished of the sentence that left unsaid. 

My eyes are contract and narrowing when I saw her eyes, gleaming with tears.

"He is gone."

"Gone…what do you mean by **gone**?" I felt like slap her face, the violent that boils inside stuns me that I stopped in time. I have never condoned punishment especially to servant, who has no strengths or powers to retaliate. 

"He has been banished from the capital." The voice said, without turning I knew it was my father.

My strength gone suddenly as I fell back, "How? Why?" I did not see the girl slipped out of the room like a rabbit being hunted. 

"I'll tell you when you get better. Hmm. Congratulation on your returning as a hero!" His voices sound proud. I close my eyes and will myself to belief that he did not die _just left the capital_.

TBC. 


	4. Chapter 3: I'll find you

Chapter 3: I'll Find You 

I was very sick, sometime I dreams and sometime memories flash back while I slept. I remembered this scene, the night before my leave Kyoto. My father stood up at the table and started to throws a cup of tea on the floor angrily,

"Listen to me Hi. Stay away from that no good stuck up Fujiwara no Sai." Clenching his teeth when he mention Sai name.

Shaking my head and said quietly "Sorry father, I promise you anything but that. Why don't you talk to him? You'll see that he is not bad and will come to love him as I does."

"What did you said? Love? Hi…my son loves that brat." He voice scream louder at each words. I see that face and that temper again, the one when he whipped the servant years ago. I realize that my father is a twisted person and he masked his off now.

 "I'm sorry father but Sai is my friend. I love him and nothing you said would change. I hope that when I return home you will reconsider my feeling and befriend with him. I love you both but I can't loose him." I said quickly and left the room to joined my team.

~~~~~~ (Present)

I wake up early in the morning and left the room the first time for many days. I wander off the southern garden where I used to hang out with my old friends. It was quiet and not many would come here especially the Ladies. 

"Tsuyujima-san" a familiar voice called, I turned around and recognize Suzuki-san

"Goodmorning Suzuki-san" I smile at the old friend, he had continued to studied and become a scholar like his father wishes.

"Congratulation, the Emperor named you as a honor Hero." I gave a laughed and said,

"And humiliate myself when I collapse right off after presented to the Emperor."

"You've not change Tsuyujima-san." We walk for a while when I asked,

"Sai! Why did he banish from the capital?" Tremble with fear and I a wait for the answer; Suzuki looks at me to show he was uneasy on how to tell me the news.

"He caught cheating by your father." I stop that not the news I expected to hear. 

"_Cheat, Cheat! Impossible_" it most laughable thing to said, if anyone knew Sai would never said the such a thing. 

Suzuki saw the looks on my face and nodded.

"Sorry Tsuyujima, I don't believe it either but some is quickly jump to believe awful things about a person" he paused "And your father word is against Sai." He started walking off but I could not let go. I must know the whole story before judge and I hate to lose one of them, my father or Sai.

After listen to the story, I shook my head. No one else seen the board and Sai lost the game so he is the Cheater. Somehow deep inside I knew who is right and who is wrong just as the sun is rise from the east and set in the east. Truth is hard to follow and who would admit that their father is guilty. The honor and shame is basically the society structured. 

I knew I have lost Sai. 

~~~~~~A Year Pass

I lie on my bed, drain away. I lost my appetite and rarely ate until it was forced on me. I lost the meaning to live. I could not face Sai so I did not search for him. What can I said? Sorry, it not enough. Honor only demand of blood spills and that I cannot do. 

I wonder where he has he gone? He did not return to his clan, it would humiliate his family so Sai would went off and never return. I knew him well; he may be like a child and innocent but his pride…it was too strong to bend. Why do I think of him? I knew he hate me too, I am my father's son. 

"Tsuyujima-sama," I looks blankly at the man, he just another servant.

"Leave me alone, I need my solitude." I coughed

"Your father is in his dead bed, he wish to speak to you." The man bows, pleading with me but all I did was laughed hysterically. 

Finally I stopped and give up _"I might as well go to see him. I still a respectable son even if he wrong me."_  I slowly get up with the man help me. My body is tired like a vegetable because I have not get off my bed for nearly a year now. It wastes away.

It was dark, the room is gloomy like it mourning it owner. Left alone with my father, I turned and looked at him. He is dying. He stills the father who loved me.

"Hi, is that you? You're better?" he grunted the words out painfully. He is really sick.

"I'm fine. No one told me you're sick father." I tried to ease his worried.

"Would you came if they told you?" he gives a smile, his eyes showing of suffering.

 "I would." I lied but then may be not. I feel confused and tears flows out suddenly that I could not hold it back.

"I'm dying Hi. I wanted to be honest with you before I gone. Do not interrupt me Hi, I knew what I did was wrong especially I see the consequence what I had done effect my son."

"Hi, you knew about my past. Years of struggled to get where I am today being a poor student. The only thing between poverty and me is that god gives me a brain and talent for Go. I work so hard and done thing that I should not have. Those unspeakable things I done will not fit for your ears, the only that hold me saint is you Hi. My pride and joy."

His eyes close as if remember the past and continues on when he is back to reality. "Sai, I hate him. Do you know why? Of course you don't…. you're a likeness to him Hi. Through your eyes I always on the pedestal, a father that you proud off but his eyes I see my soul and that I cannot bear."

"As you known he becomes the Emperor's Go instructor. He takes away part of my role and honor that have been mine for many years. He was my rival but he did not even acknowledge me."

I shook my head tried to say that Sai just love Go and honor of being an instructor is nothing to him. 

"I don't mind the rivalry but when he took you away. No don't say anything Hi. Your friendship had been a long time, this is the true isn't it? I don't even know when you two first met but I know it long enough for you to began to compare us. You came to see that I'm not so perfect as you belief. "

I was astounded but it is true, unconsciously I had done that. I did not see my father to adult eyes but through Sai eyes. Sai has become my model. 

I lower my head in anguished.

There was a long silence but his voice echoed the room once more, 

"What I did was unforgivable. When you left Kyoto, my heart is fill with grief for I have lost my son. I decided that he had to pay, he took everything that are values to me. I came and challenge him to an official match, and the Emperor is our judge." He pause as if he don't wanted to continue,

"If you don't want to father I understand."

"No, I must tell you all before I died. We played an evenly match but it is a battle I needs to win. I need to revenge what he did to me. I disgrace myself and slip a stone onto my plate. I looked up and found that he has seen what I did. I quickly accused him before he had the change to said anything." 

As this point I wanted to stand up and leave. Either that or beaten my father up which is not an option. His hand reaches mine,

 "Forgive me Hi. I've suffered watching you wasted away. I destroyed the person I loves most, this is my punishment from God." He breathe started to get heavier,

I wanted to shake his hand off; my tears ever flowing that blind my eyes.

"Hi, please before I died said you forgive me even if you not able to love me anymore." My father cried out loud, begging to be release from earthy bond.

I had always been a dutiful son but this is too much. I stared at him trying to focus he face. 

He did not look like my beloved father but a stranger laying there dying. I'm not cruel enough to watch him died like that. I said hoarsely that like stranger voice, 

"I forgive you. May you rest in peace." 

"Thank you Hi! The last time I saw him leaves the capital I spoke to him." I turned around to face him as my hand clasped his sleeves

"What did you say?"

"I told him not to bother to find you. You'll not believe him but me. Who would believe a friend rather their own flesh and blood?" 

I nearly strangle him at that moment, is there no end to his malice.  

"Go and find him Hi. Please asked him to forgive me and told him I really regret…"

His eyes close and I knew that he gone leaving me hell again. I punch the wall until my hand bleeds and too weak to moved. 

"You're a selfish old man father. You may be free but I'm not. I may forgive you but who forgive me." I crouched up and weep.

~~~~~~ Five years later

Have it been five years ago that I left Kyoto? I leave my position, wealth behind to search for you Sai. Where are you? Each night I get lonelier and the burden of guilt are heavier. Now I cannot move further, my search for you is over. I am dying. 

I close my eyes ready to die. I had never picture myself dying alone in the middle of forest before. I do not care anymore but seeing you. My hand clutched the grass trying to hold on but I have reached my limit. 

Laying here I knew I have lying to myself. You had died a long time ago after being banished from the capital. You have too much pride; your love for Go and the humiliation is far too much for you to live. If I have been there then I can lend you my strength to go on but I off somewhere else. 

I keep hoping that you able to surpass and going on living somewhere so we can unit again. I am ashamed of myself. My dying wish is to find you again. No, I'll not give up. I'll find you. Even if it is takes me through eternity. 

(That was Hi last thought before slipping away into darkness.)

~~~~~ 

"He has been punished enough" a voice said,

"He should not have interfered with Fate." Another voice chuckle,

"What about Sai? Let help them. We have all been friends so long for me to sit by and watched this tragedy enfold." The voice cried watching Hi going through many lives suffering.

"You'll not help them at all. It will only make their fates more complicate. Leave it to Father in Heaven hand." 

" If you don't than I'll." Snapped at her companion.

~~~~~ 

The wind suddenly changes the current course leaving waves to change direction, heading toward Hiroshima Island instead outward to sea. The wave carried with it an old goban. Drifting ever closer to it destiny. 

TBC.

P.S What you think? It is easy to guess what happen next huh! 


	5. Chapter 4: Kuwahara Torajirou

Hi, this is the second part of the story. It is about Honinbo Shusaku life. This part of the story is mainly from Sai point of view. Akira will be later joined the story (his incarnation in this era) and offcourse some of the gang. I hope you enjoyed the story as much as I write it. If possible please review.  

Chapter 4: Kuwahara Torajirou

My name is Kuwahara Torajirou and I was born in 5 May 1829 in a small village out skirt of Onomichi. My life is quiet and quite boring. I'm a loner. I do not know why I often felt sad without appearance reason to do so. Since I refer the solitude may be it just a _state of mind_. I have stayed away from the village children all my life because they were not what I looking for. 

My mother is a very quiet women, she rarely talks may be that is why my father married her. I only heard from her the very maximum is twenty words a day. My father is a merchant that why I almost never see him, he is all way on the road. 

I'm the only one in my village who has a tutor as my father the only one who can afford. The other children mocking me behind my back but I do not care even through I understand how they feel. Our village is poor and I felt guilty often when I watched my neighbors struggled to survive everyday. Do I sound too old for a five years old kid? But then I have lot of spared time to think.   

My only joy is playing Go that introduced by my tutor. We have to sketch up the board on the sand to play because Obata sensei did not able to acquired one nor do I. I wanted to ask my father but he is always busy and properly thinks it is a waste of money. Whenever I play Go I feels happy as if I feel closer to what I seek.  

Today as usual I sitting on the beach, Obata sensei just left after the game we has because he off to see a friend. I sat there lost in my thought again. Suddenly I felt slightly chills, surprise at the changing wind and decided to go home or my mother would worry. I started to walk back to the village when something made me turn around, a vibration that so strong is drawn to me. I found a goban covered with seaweed floating on the foam water. It looks very old. Quickly pick it up and for some reason I have never been felt so good. 

TBC.

What do you think? The next chapter is harder for me to write…Sai character is umm. The way he thinking is difference than anyone. He is innocent in one minute and adult the next. (Groan…. I need inspiration.)

For this chapter the incaination is list below: 

Torajirou is Hikaru 

Obata sensei is Mitani 


	6. Chapter 5: The Goban

Sorry but I like the version of Torajirou find the goban at the beach. I don't know if the goban would be effected by the seawater or not but I'll resume it did not after all it is my story.

In this story Torajirou meet Sai somewhere in November 1834.

Chapter 5: The Goban 

I was half awake and dream while waiting for another game to play on the Goban I haunts. The players never seen me but it is enough to watch the games. The Goban passed around for century to different owners until it came to a small island in the sea of Seto. 

It was a week ago when the late owner of goban pass away. He is strong Go player and he love for Go, as much as I have but it is a pity he did not see me. I often cried because I could not play but just stand by to watch. May be it is enough for a while but nearly a thousand years have passed and no one has seen me. Is this my punishment for not moving on?

 I was snapped awake when my goban is thrown out to the sea. I recognised it was the owner daughter, she hate Go but to throw it away. Geez! I wanted to reach out and shaking her. It was not her fault to hate Go, her father has neglected the family and spent his entire life at the goban. I sighed and give up. The goban would not last long in the sea and then where would I be?  It was drifting further outward and I knew I was doom. 

Suddenly I feel warm touches and open my eyes from my sleep. I look upon a young boy, he was wiped the goban to clean off the seaweed that attached to it. My heart lift up and knew that I had found a new owner. The board now is clean but he kept wiping it. Surprise at the behaviour I appear behind him to see what he is doing. 

Amazing he hand is on the tears stain that I have shredded many times over the year. Could it be? No, God would not granted my wish, as I am being so selfishly remanning on earth. I open my mouth afraid to speak but the word excites slip out.

"Child, if you see my tears of resentment. Allows me to settle down in a small part of your heart."

He turned around and sees me. He was clearly shocked but immediately control himself, his eyes gaze at me as if searching for something and what ever he is searched he had found it because his lip spread a little smile. 

I was astonished too! I have never met someone like this, he is fearless and he eyes it almost seeing through my soul. 

"Who are you?" he asked,

Take aback at his attitude for a small boy; I give him a bright smile that people used to compliment me when I was alive. 

"My name is Fujiwara no Sai. I am a Go's instructor for the sovereign in the Heina era." I said,

"You're a ghost." It was a statement and not a question, the small boy accepted me without question. I look at him closer and there is something about him that me feels warmth even through my body is cold as ice.  

"My name is Kuwahara Torajirou." He voice sound so serious like an adult that made me wince. I'm much more an outgoing person and being a ghost I was no longer care for tradition convention customs that is being reserves and politeness. Life is short to be on guard all the times.

I promise myself that I will help him to loosen up and enjoyed life in returned he would let me to play Go. I grinned at the thought and notice he wait for me to explain. I hate to remember that time, the reason why I died. However, I knew I must told Torajirou the story because it is a way of establishing friendship as I am going to stayed with him and I needs his help.

~~~~~~~(Flash back)

Tsuyujima Hi was left a few days ago. I missed him already; he is the only one I spent time with when I am not played Go. We are both alike in views of life that there was a little surprise when we become inseparable. However, I knew his father hate me but it all right as long Hi is by my side I do not care if the world turns against me.

 "Fujiwara-san, I challenge you to a duel of Go game. The winner will be the only instructor to the Emperor." Hi's father voice snapped me back to present. I almost miss the challenge that he has issue being daydream. So he is formally challenges me, it is a surprise but why after all this time? With out further thinking I agreed, this may be the way to end of the silent feudal he is waging at me. 

We played an even game. He has years of experienced but I have the ability to read ahead. I was busy to think of my next move when I noticed he slipped a stone from his sleeve on the winning tray. I was shocked at such behaviour. I have never imagined someone would do such a dishonourable act. I was about to say out loud but Hi's face appears before my eyes. I could not bring myself to ashamed his father. However, the voice shakes me back to reality. 

"You just dropped a black stone onto your tray as a stone you won."

"What?" still dazed from being accused but recovered enough to said

"That was what you just did." I defence myself began to stand up,

"While everyone's attention on the goban you mixing the stone into your Go cash and placed it as a stone you had won." He called out angrily. He such a good actor I thought. 

I could not believe it and the only words that came out is, "You're the one that's bluffing."

We both stopped when the Emperor voice rang out the Chamber, and whole room silent at once.

"What a distasteful accusation! Be silent." He continues, "I don't even want to think such as disgraceful act was committed before me. Continue the match."

There is nothing else I can do but sitting down and continue the game. Trying as I might, I knew I was losing. Losing means that I lied, it such an unfair world that I wanted to cried but managed to hold my tears. I turned to see my family who was at present. They eyes averted from me looking ashamed. How could they believe I done such a thing? I wanted to scream at them but I look down at the goban instead and await for everyone to leave. 

The last words the Emperor said when he left was, "Fujiwara no Sai, from this day onward you will never set foot onto Kyoto or before me again." I saw my uncle walk after him and stared accusingly at me for being act shameful to our family name. 

I sat there tried to come in term of what happening. At last I stood up walked out the Chamber when I see he waiting for me, his voice started me.

"Fujiwara, don't bother to finds my son. If you think you can make him to believe what has happened then you mistaken. Would you think he would believe your word over of his father? His own flesh and blood." He gave a low evil chuckled and I knew he was right. My own family did not even believe me, how Hi would when the cheater is his father?

I walked out the capital kept wandered on the road for two days until I reached a lake. My sorrows and shames has droved me to the edge. No one believes me. I have no one. My existence is no longer matter. The next I knew I walked further into the river and drowning myself from such sad cruel world. 

 I felt my soul is floating on the air moving onward outside this realm to a place that it calling me to return. 

~~~~~ (Present)

"Yet I still want to play Go. I turn back to earth because I was unable to rest in peace and my soul linger on a goban." I finished tell him the story but left out Hi because I cannot bear to think of those I loves who had turn their back on me. 

"I been lingered on the goban and watched many matches but unable to play because no one has seen me." I finished off sadly seeing that my companion is quiet. He looks poignant after listened to the story and finally give a nodded as if come to a decision.

"Fujiwara san, would you like to play Go? I'll let you played instead of me." His question jolt me, I looks at him uncertainty. Obvious he loves Go, it shows through the way how he has carefully cleaned it like a treasure. I wanted to ask why but too afraid that he will change his mind. I immediately nodded in agreement. God is so good to me!

TBC.

What do you think? Did Sai sound out of character? I repeat a bit from the anime but that is what happens at the duel so no point of changing it. Thanks for reading it. Please review! I would like to improve on Sai character.   


	7. Chapter 6: Prodigy Child

Author note: You may wonder why Torajirou behaviour is completely difference than Hikaru. My explanation is that I believe each life we live in we would be affect by our environment, circumstance that build our character. Although there are still some of the behaviours of our past lives would remain with us in. 

_For this chapter the incarnations during Edo era are the same, as the following characters in Hikaru no Go:_

_Obata sensei                                                    Mitani Yuki_

_Shoto sensei                                                    Kaga Tetsuo _

_Lord Asano                                                     Hikaru's grandfather_

_Yoshida Ryu                                                     Tsutsui Kimihiro_

_Hosenji Hoshin                                                Shirakawa sensei_

Ito Showa                                                        Yashiro Kiyoharu 

_History document state that Lord Asano is patron of Torajirou when he is renown as **Prodigy Child **(he was only six years old). He studies under Hosenji Hoshin, a player of professional level__ until November 1837.  He also played a game with Ito Showa in January 1837, who one of the Four Tempo (strongest player in that time). Ito is impressed with Torajirou's ability.  _

Chapter 6: Prodigy Child 

It have been a week since I'm staying with Torajirou, we getting along fine but he is so quiet that I afraid going to be crazy. He studies hard and extremely very smart. His tutor, Obata sensei is not bad player but compare with my skill he had no chance at all. I cause him to bewilder after slaughter the game and he has not came back since two days now. 

I sigh staring out the window and regret my action. I should have not done it but being able to play again after a thousand years I did not hold my strength back. 

After I finished the game, I quickly darted my eyes over to Torajirou and find that he is smiling for some time. It is slowly changing to a smirk as his sensei look up at him.

"You're happy Torajirou?" I asked,

"Obata sensei looks funny with his eyes popping out like that." He said quietly and goes on,

"Our strength is equal. It must a great deal of alarm for him to react that way, being slaughter by you like that." Torajirou looks down at the game. 

"You're strong Sai." He nodded examine the game again with great interest.

"Shall we go over it? Sai. Why did you move here?" he pointed at the stone far left corner. 

"Sure Torajirou. I like to play Obata –san again." I said excitedly thinking of another game to be play, 

"He'll not come back for a few days." Torajirou predicted and give his attention back to the game.

~~~~~~ A month later

Torajirou and I are at the festival fair in Onomichi town today. It was so crowd that we lost his parent sight. Even tall as I am, I could not make out where they are. Torajirou is more open up now then he first met me. He really a strange child and is far too old for his age. 

I look down to see if he is all right and amaze that he does not care being lost at all. In fact he is too busy looks at the hand-made masks on the shelf near to them. Suddenly he moves over to other side where a small hut built for resting (one of those with a roof on four pillars). I tried to call out but notice that gobans are inside. Torajirou is stop at the stair and waited for me to come,

"Shall we go in?" he grinned with knowing smiles. I gulp and nodded.

We played many games and I won all of them. People started gather around and watched my matches. Many challenges were offered that overwhelm me. I has only played a few games with Obata –san and he often disappeared for a day or two. It quite depressing but the village is small and no one in the village knew how to play nor care or even have time.  

I was come to a stop when Torajirou's mother touched his arm and said, "We were worried about you." She scolds at him "Let go home son." That was all she needs to say for Torajirou to stop and smile at his opponent to resign.

"Let the boy play." His father said surprisingly, my opponent look up and acknowledge Torajirou's father

"Good evening, Kuwahara san. Is this your son?" the man said,

"Yes, Torajirou said good evening to Tanaka san." He bade his son to greet the stranger,

After the introduction, Tanaka san smiles at the boy and said to his father, 

"Your son is talent. He had managed to defeat most of us here. Kuwahara san. You must be please."  The rest of the conversation is unheard as it was out of my hearing range when I follow Torajirou who walking off with his mother.

~~~~~~~~ 2 months later

I can able to played Go most of the time now, grinning and jumping around the room while Torajirou sat at the table reading. After that festival, Torajirou's father has allowed his son to go to Onomichi town at least three days a week, accompany by Obata sensei. I have played many matches with the other Go players since then. 

The game was held at the same place where we had played at the festival. It was always crowd showing that the people love for the game. It has not change since my time. The community often stops to play when they are passing. The market is quite close that the street is always busy and noisy but it gives a friendly atmosphere.

Torajirou's father had purchased a Goban and stones when he last returns home. Torajirou's was happy as if he was happy because I am happy, he often looks at me lately as if to said something but cry off for some reason. 

"Hey Torajirou, we going to Onomichi tomorrow right?" smile enthusiastic at the prospect of another challenge game. The Go game has been evolution since my time Hiena era that it really great to just learn a new moves. 

Torajirou looks up and simply nodded. I really wished he would speak to me more because I could not tell what he is thinking. It really frustrated, while I am an open book to him, he is completely blank to me. He knows what I want before I even speak up and it rather unnerving. 

The next morning we are off early to town, have a lift on a vegetable cart that traveling to town every morning. Obata sit besides trying to get Torajirou off his book but fail miserably. However, he manages to make me laugh even through only Torajirou heard me. 

It was usual morning games I played well and happy of my streak of winning. A hand clasp on Torajirou's shoulder that both of us turned around to face the stranger. Torajirou face is blank with expression, although his eyebrow risen up as if command the stranger to take his hand off. I notice that Torajirou do not like to be touch, he always stay far away from other people contact as he could. 

"So you the child everyone bragging about?" the man said, he have a messy hair that it seem he has not been brush it for months.

"Can I help you?" Torajirou voice is stiff, showing discomfort at the closeness. I notice whispered around me and manage to hear his name,

"Isn't that Shoto sensei? The best player on the island." 

_"The best player" _I mutter and fill with the madness desire to challenge him, my hand pull around Torajirou neck and said,

"Let me play him, Torajirou." Torajirou turn away and looked defeated then said to the man who still not reply his question,

"Would you like a game, sir." He enquired politely,

The man nodded and said,

"If you beat me, I'll called you **Prodigy Child** from now on." He said smugly believe there is no way the little six years old kid before him could win.

I was barely managing to win because he is good. No wonder they called him the best player on the island. From that day on Torajirou was known as the Prodigy Child. Shoto-san often plays with me after that day and invites us over to his school where he is teaching. 

It always turn out like a following schedule: after the game Shoto-san and I played then he and Torajirou would discussed Literature, Politics that would seem far-fetched for a six years old kid but seeing the games we have, Torajirou is a genius after all. 

~~~~~ April 1835

Torajirou's mother helps him to dress up in one of his beautiful outfit. He is to present to Lord Asano today (the daimyo of the region), who invite Torajirou (me) to play a game. The Prodigy Child name has been spread for over the last month. 

"I'm O.K, mother" Torajirou cried out embarrass by his mother attention. I watch him with a brilliant smile. He has change a bit, more out going and you could tell by his vocabulary.  

We arrived at the manor that morning, I walked beside Torajirou and pointing out various artifact that I recognized. Torajirou like those things a lot, he knowledge of history is astonishing. It hard to believe but Torajirou is a well-known scholar too. 

Lord Asano sit at end of the room waiting for us, he was old but there is a glint of mischief behind those eyes. A young man stood beside him look at the Torajirou, surprise is written all over his face. Torajirou was quite small for his age; he looks even younger than his age. 

"You're Kuwahara Torajirou, the Prodigy Child." Lord Asano voice said, Torajirou give a bow and reply,

"Yes, my name is Kuwahara Torajirou, Asano-sama."

"I was told you are very good at Go game." Lord Asano smile, "Go is my favorite game to pass the time. Let us play a game as I've request." He nodded to a servant to get the goban. 

"That was a very good game." After he admit defeat and thank you Torajirou for the game. 

"You've a great potential and for one so young too. A future of bright path is open up for you." He nodded the servant to clear off the game.

"Thank you." Torajirou reply and bow his head for the compliment.

"However, you still have a great deal to learn before becoming the best. I'll let my personal trainer Hosenji-san to teach you. He is a priest but a player at a professional level. You'll meet him tomorrow." Lord Asano smile and turned to indicate the young man to come forth,

"This is my nephew, Yoshida Ryu he will also studying with you. I believe Yoshida will able to learn a lot from you."  Yoshida came forward and bow at the introduction. After that he shows us around the manor. 

He is too a quiet young man and I hope that Torajirou will not pick up the silent habit again. He has changed a little; to watch him back to his old self is a bit too much I grimace. Torajirou turned to me inquiring as if he knows that I was thinking about him. 

~~~~~~~~ 3 weeks later

We have come often to Hosenji Temple over the weeks _(it could have a different name at the time and called after Hosenji Hoshin today. This is the second place where Hikaru visited when he searched for Sai)_ to train with Hoshin. Torajirou become close friend with Hoshin so they on the first name basic. 

Besides playing Go, Torajirou learned a lot of religious believes and practices through Hoshin. I find it is interesting as well but Go still the only thing for me. They discussed religious right now so I wander off to look outside the window. It is really peaceful here and quite far away from the rest of civilization. The temple built on a small island next to Hiroshima Island that why we have to take a small boat to come here everyday. 

Torajirou was seasick but somehow he just keeps coming back, I knew that he doing it for me and that made me feel guiltier. I wish I could make him happy because he gives every thing and asked nothing back. 

Hoshin religion stuff has goes into his head, his spare time, which was not much after spending studying and played Go game for me, and he used it to take care the other villagers. Help them out with gardening or look after younger children and so on. I often wonder where he has the energy. However, I see that he is happier and that is all the matter right? 

~~~~~~ January 1837

Ito Showa is coming. Lord Asano told the news. I was pacing around; I knew that I would have a chance to play with one of the Tempo Four. 

"Sit down Sai." Torajirou called out, laughing happily at my anxiety. I look at my friend and smile. We are friend yes and time has bonded us. He is more open with me but still quiet and steady child. He has graduate with top honor in academic school of Onomichi for eight years old. 

 "Ito-san will not be here until next week Sai." He was amuse at my enthusiastic,

"But---Torajirou. I want to play him now." I grumble, started to pull his sleeve to get his attention. I knew that I would have his full attention when I did that. He put down the pen and looks at me.

"Why don't we go to see Yoshida for a game hmm. That would cheer you up." I nodded happily and off we go.

"You playing Ito sensei next week." Yoshida whistle, Torajirou nod 

"You're one hell of a cool customer." Yoshida tease him, Torajirou only smile watching me and said,

"I am more excited about the coming game then nervousness." He speaking for me, he often done that expressed what I think when it come to Go.

"Oh wow, I wish I strong enough to play with him but you know me. I did not improve much as all even when Hoshin tutor me more than you." Yoshida give a shrug with long depresses face, Torajirou pat his shoulder to comfort him.  I was surprised at the gesture and I feel jealous for the first time. Torajirou is mine. I only felt this way with Hi and it was so long ago. I look away and suppress the feeling.

"Did you know that he is called Owari no Matsujiro. Just imagine if you able to beat him." Torajirou just shake his head and amuse while I move off to looks at the painting on the wall. Life becomes more complicate even when I do not have my own body.

~~~~~~ A week later

I have improved for the last two years. I become more stronger than Hoshin so I very confident with the match. Ito sensei looks like he in his mid thirty years old. He was cheerful and a good friend of Lord Asano. Torajirou talk to him a lot about Go world, he knew I would interest such information. 

He is really sensitive to the other people, attention to their needs before he own. I admired him a lot and I have never did before that is admiring someone else.   

It was second day he visit that I play a game with him. After a few move, I knew he is much better than me but I kept attacking trying to close the gape. I lose the game in the end. He was more experienced than me. Torajirou bow his head to resign and said thank you for the game. He was sad because I am sad as well. 

"Your playing is great." Ito voice spoke up broken the silence room, 

"I've heard of you Torajirou but what you show me today it is more than I believe a child is capable." Torajirou looks up to me, wonder how I felt about it. I give him a smile indicate that I very happy with the game,

"I learned a lot from the game, Torajirou." I said comfort him instead of the other way around.

Torajirou accepted my feeling and turn back to discuss the game with Ito. I have never see Torajirou play but he understanding of the games and knowing the better move should be made that really startle me. After the discussion Ito turned to Torajirou and said seriously,

"You need a better teacher than Hoshin from now. Your ability has beaten him already. I recommend that you should enter Honinbo School and study under Shuwa sensei." 

Torajirou looks surprise at the advice and only nod 

"Thank you Ito sensei. I'll thinking about it." Bowing to both Ito sensei and Lord Asano before leaving the room.  

TBC.

Sorry about the story, it kind of windy huh but I wanted to explain how Torajirou become famous. I give Torajirou the love for history because for the reason I do not think Sai care much for it when he only love is Go and he seem to know a lot when he teaching Hikaru. 

_Those may say that he living in one but just think of the world today. If you not reading about it would you know what happening around you. _Thank you for reading it, any question just asked. I'll do my best to answer. 


	8. Chapter 7: Honinbo School

_Author Note: I really have a hard time tried to match the Hikaru no Go characters with history figures, the choice of who would be the best to be Akira…ahhh! Thinking about it given me nightmare! Thanks for reading. ___

For this chapter the incarnations during Edo era are the same as the following characters in Hikaru no Go:

_Ishigaya Kosaku Waya Yoshitaka_

_Tsuchiya Shuwa Touya Akira_

_Nakagawa Inari Akari _

_Nakagawa Jowa Kuwabara Honinbo_

_Honinbo Josaku Touya Koyo_

_Sato Shuseki Honda Toshinori_

_Kato Ryuwa Fukui Yuta_

_Tsuruoka Saburosuke Iijima Ryo_

_Kishimoto Saichiro Tsubaki Toshiro_

_Yoshida Etsu (the only female disciple) Nase Asumi_

_Koizumi Fujimatsu Kishimoto Kaoru_

_Disclaimer: This story is fiction; I mean no **disrespect** to history Go players and their family. So don't sue me. _

_History states that in November 1837, Shusaku was sent to Edo to become a disciple of the Honinbo School. On 28 November 1839, Shusaku was awarded a shodan diploma, and in 1840 he went back to Hiroshima and stayed home for one-year._

**Chapter 7:Honinbo school**

Torajirou did not last well on board. He face is still pale from seasick and pleased to find his feet on the land again. I watch amused at the fuss Senji made over Torajirou. I was worried over Torajirou but seeing him now I knew the worse is over. 

There was no point of making a ruckus about it and it would further embarrass him like Senji did. Senji is Kuwahara's household servant; he was order to accompany Torajirou to Honinbo School and return home after deliver Torajirou to safely. 

Right now Senji is argued with the driver over the price, while both Torajirou and I gasping the sight with awes. 

"So this is the new capital." I murmured, suddenly I heard Torajirou scream _(Edo is the old name for Tokyo)_

"Thief, thief…gives back my bag. Someone stop him." When I turn around to see that Torajirou already ahead chasing after a small boy. The thief boy ran toward the crowd and disappears.

I hear a crash come next and then Torajirou moaning from pain. Torajirou is on top of a young man, he must have hurdle the man over when he smash into into him. The young man groan but unhurt laying on the floor, he eyes is adjusting to Torajirou. For that second I notice the way he looks at Torajirou, it almost akin to love. I must have imagined it because there is no way he could look at Torajirou that way at the first glance. 

"Sorry." Torajirou apologise after getting off him. 

"You're in hurry?" the man queried

"Yes, a thief just stole my bag. I am so sorry about the accident." Torajirou bow his head _(I wonder if they ever tired of bowing because I'm tired just writing it)._

"I see. I'll helps you in searched for him." The stranger offers a hand

"Properly he has long gone from here." Torajirou sigh,

"We just have a look around here, usually the thief is from this area." He smiles sadly at the knowledge,

We walk around but there was no sign of the thief. Out of the corner Torajirou spot him. He was bend over Torajirou's bag and searching. The young man immediately seize the thief collar, I was surprise to see he was about Torajirou age. His hair was messy and his clothes were dirty. There little cinder spread on his face and his eyes glaring at the man who caught him. 

The man handed over Torajirou his bag but his eyes did not leave the little thief face.

"You're knows that stealing is crime right?" he scolded at the boy,

"Please sir, I won't do it again." The boy plead for mercy,

"I don't think this is your first time. I better called the police over to handle this." Immediately the word police made the boy struggle to break free. I find the decision is a bit too harsh but before I spoke to Torajirou when a voice interrupts us,

"Hey, Tsuchiya-san! We have a meeting remember." The young man turn and nodded after put the boy down,

"You'll behave yourself." He warned before waving goodbye to Torajirou, 

"Torajirou, he tried to sneak off." Torajirou turned around catch the boy hand to stop him.

"Hey, where do you think you going?" He eyes brow rise up. 

"Let me go. You've your bag back." The other boy sneer,

"Tell me why you did that…stealing." Torajirou asked curiously, he has never witnessed such act before. The boy clearly sees the shock in Torajirou eyes so he said,

"You'll know when you gone hungry for days." The boy snipped at Torajirou ignorant,

"I'm sorry." Torajirou looks the boy with a new awareness, Torajirou gaze cause the boy to stare down at his feet and embarrass his outburst.

"Where do you live?" Torajirou asked,

"Why?" the boy is obvious offence but the look into Torajirou eyes only brought the boy to flush further

"I'm homeless and I don't need one." He said quietly but there still some of pride and loneliness behind his words.

"I'm sorry to hear that. My name is Kuwahara Torajirou and what is your?"

"Koizumi Fujimatsu." 

I proud of Torajirou, he manages to bring the boy out of his shell. They are talking and it shows that Koizumi life was not a picnic. Both of his parents died last summer when they move to Edo to find worked. Koizumi Fujimatsu was left alone and did not know how to returned to his old village. He been survived through pick up scarf food and learned how to steal. There is no doubt that there are other children in the same circumstance but I wonder how we will solve this one. 

"Sai!" I look down at Torajirou and asked what he wants,

"Could he stay with us, Sai? I mean I'll have room for myself in Honinbo School, I don't think he will bother anyone." 

I give him a smile and knew it solve the problem for now anyway. Torajirou is like that, that why have come I love him.

~~~~~

"Fujimatsu!" Torajirou cried tried to pull the goban off his friend bottom. While I stand there raving about how could anyone inconsiderate as to sat on a goban?

Torajirou is trying to explain Fujimatsu about Go, who only shrug his shoulder and said 

"It is only a game, no big deal." leaving Torajirou to sigh and get back to his packing.

A knock on the door and some one called out,

"Kuwahara-san, you're request to see the honourable head school Honinbo Josaku." 

Torajirou slide the door open to find one of servant,

"Please lead the way." 

We walk a few blocks until he reach a room, inside it was simple decorate but it stylish. There was a group of people gather around an old man. He face was gentle and his wrinkle only shows of determination and wisdom of old age. However one young man stood out the most, I looks down to see that Torajirou also recognise him. 

After the formal greeting, Honinbo Josaku smile pleasing at the new disciple of his school, Torajirou name have been spread to Edo now.

"This is Shuwa my heir, you will study under him." The young man they met come forward and beam at Torajirou,

"If I has known you is Kuwahara-san then we would arrive here together."

"You've met." Josaku surprised at the greeting. They all have good laughs after the explanation.

"Just never imagine anyone could top Shuwa." A voice teases and walk forward to greet Torajirou, his hair is messy that remind me of Shoto sensei. 

"My name is Ishigaya Kosaku. I'm also from Hiroshima, I glad that some here is from the same region." Torajirou delight with the news, they will have something common to chat about. 

The other disciples were Sato Shuseki, Kato Ryuwa, Tsuruoka Saburosuke, Kishimoto Saichiro, and Yoshida Etsu. However, all of them are professional Go players. _(Of course there are other disciples but these are the inner circle from my point of view.)_

As I watch over the scene I'm glad that Torajirou find new friends but why do I feel this loneliness in my heart?

~~~~~~ 1 month later

I was looking over the recreate game that Shuwa and I have played yesterday. My skills is not there yet but I knew he is not far ahead of me either. Shuwa skill is better than Ito-san, no wonder that he is the top four Tempo. My fan tapping slightly at the goban, I knew where did I go wrong. I did not notice that Torajirou have moved aside me, he was silent but his present comfort me. The words are unspoken and I smile brightly at him.

"Let go outside. Sai." Torajirou said, notice the room is gloomy compare to the sunshine outdoor. 

We walk silently each in their own thought. I wonder if Torajirou has regretted of coming here. My selfishness had led him here. I watched him slept every night as he cried out for his mother. I have asked in the morning but he ignored the question as if I did not mention it at all. It pained me now and yet my selfishness I still wanted to play Go. My passions for Go game. Is it a curse or a gift from god? Whatever the answer, I have a new objective now; it is to reach the Hand of God. 

"Lets her go!" Torajirou commanding voice jerks me back and I see that Torajirou was stand ahead shoving some other children off the little girl. She was cried and her wrist was bruised from the strong hold. The group of bully ran off, leaving the girl on the ground sniffing,

"Are you Ok?" Torajirou pick her up and give his handkerchief to the girl,

"It not hurt is it?" He look worried, examined her hand 

"I'm alright now." She said hiccup at the same time, quickly she face flush as turn away from Torajirou. I give a groan, not another one. 

"I'm glad you're fine. My name is Kuwahara Torajirou and nice to meet you." He said politely, stare at the girl. She is pretty, with eyes wide and shinning tears that would touch anyone heart. There was no doubt Torajirou feel that too and he is human after all. Torajirou flushed when he notices that he is staring,

"My name is Nakagawa Inari, please called me Inari." She stammers a bit but rather cute,

"Oh, there is my dad." Inari said, called out for her father.

We both turn to see a man walked forward and surprisingly he is with Shuwa. My eyes are accessing him, a Go player. After Shuwa introduced the stranger, I knew I would like to play a game with the late Honinbo titleholder, Jowa. However, I did not jumped for joy at the prospect of playing. My eyes still on the little girl who eyes barely leave Torajirou face. 

~~~~~ 28 November 1839

I stood there watched Torajirou taking the award shodan diploma. He smiles at me,

"Are you happy Sai?" He asks and I only nodded. My skills have passed a shodan when I joined Honinbo School but for political reason, I did not receive my award until now. I did not care for the little piece of paper. I love Go and there will never be a paper that wills shows how much. 

"Let us go home, Torajirou." I said suddenly it must have surprise him but he nodded as always. I need more times to be with him. Here, I was too distracted with Go and I afraid I might loose him. 

TBC.

_What going on? Well you can see Sai feeling is insecure and he have the reason to be. I really hate that feeling but when you loved someone…._

_Thank you for reading it. Oh! I've to make up Inari name because I could find out what Jowa's daughter name is. _

_The reason why I match Kaoru character with Koizumi Fujimatsu go player is that Kaoru helps Hikaru to realize that Akira won't wait for him forever...this may be a way to paid back the kindness in his past life. Karma? _


	9. Chapter 8: Shusaku

_History state that in 1840, during a one-year visits back home, Torajirou was awarded a yearly stipend by Lord Asano. Arriving back in Edo in September 1841, Shusaku was given the name we now know him under, and promoted to 2-dan. In 1843, still only 14 years old, he was promoted to 4-dan. In 1844 he left for Onomichi. _

For this chapter the incarnations during Edo era are the same, as the following characters in Hikaru no Go:

_Nakagawa Kamesaburo Re Pin___

_Sugiyama Senwa__ Hon Suyon_

_Mizuno Tadakuni Shinoda Insei Shihan_

Chapter 8: Shusaku 

"Hosenji sensei is returning tomorrow." Yoshida said and looks up from the goban watching Torajirou reaction, 

"I see." was all he replied,

There was a long silent and the sound of the go stone touch the goban echoes the small room,

"What the matter?" Yoshida asked surprising at Torajirou attitude for Torajirou always have a deep respect to his first teacher.

"Nothing, I'm tired Yoshida. Can you come back tomorrow, we'll finish the game off then." Torajirou already stood up, left Yoshida speechless being dismiss for the first time by Torajirou.

"O.K. Uncle asked after you, why don't you drop by tomorrow." Yoshida suggested and leaving quickly after Torajirou agreed. 

~~~~~~ 10 minutes later

"What's wrong with you Sai?" Torajirou yelled at me, it was surprised because it was unlike him but I knew it coming. 

What can I said? I'm even not sure why myself.

"It's have been five months and you still sulked since we left Edo." He pushes his hair back tried to be calm after his outburst,

"It not as I who requested that we should go home in the first place." He murmured angrily, fuming in fact for the right word.

I could not help but to stare at him. Some how this new side of Torajirou excites me. This is what I wanted not knowing until now. I hate his quiet self. The one under that is emotional under locked key, which I did not knew where I would stood before him. I knew he love me but sometime I feels like an unwanted baggage that he have to carry. 

"Damn it, said something." Torajirou reach out wanted to shake me,

"I'm sorry Torajirou. I'm afraid of loosing you." I said, one of the many reasons that trouble me before leaving Edo. He stared at me strangely,

"How could you loose me Sai? Aren't we support to stayed together for the rest of our life." 

Torajirou is so young. He did not understand what I mean and so I admitted defeat. 

"Of course Torajirou. It properly I worried too much." I calm his anxiety down and he was relaxed once more. 

"Let visit Obata sensei." I was smiling like I used to, it has been a while since I did that and it feel good. 

It was years later until the subject brought up again. 

~~~~~~ Four moths later 

"British opium wars in China had finally reached Japan and it frightened our people." Hoshin said sadly,

"They have a reason to be." Torajirou agreed angrily. Society has change recent years leaving the population unrest. His villagers like the rest of Japan getting poorer even through Lord Asano in their region tried his best to help but it got worsen. The economics is at the point of collapsing. 

Hoshin sigh and said,

"For the first time in many years, I feel so helpless. Praying did not help either." 

"Let us return to the game Hoshin, at least it take you off the problems for a while." 

Hoshin looks down at the goban and shake his head. 

"I've to resign for this game. It looks like there is no move left that would get me out of this spot." 

"Thanks for the game, you have improved Hoshin." Torajirou said, we both agreed at this. 

Hoshin have become Inoue pupil after we left for Edo and also become 1 dan in 1840.

"I'm glad you think so Torajirou. After you've left Onomichi, I have done a lot of think. I don't want to fall behind from you too much so I decide to become Inoue School disciple." He looks at Torajirou to continue,

"I like the games we play and seeing you're enthusiastic for Go have also motivated me too. I'm happy with the decision I've made. I guess you've change my life." 

His confession is delight me, I'm please with the compliment Hoshin have given me. It would be something I'll always treasure. 

(Another lovable character in Hikaru no Go is Shirakawa sensei, Hikaru's teacher at Go school in the first few episodes. I tried to link Hoshin with Shirakawa. In one of the episode where Hikaru is asked to play a game during Morishita tutorial class so that he (Shirakawa) would be motivate for his next dan contest.) 

"Hosenji sensei." Yoshida voice reaches us before we could see he face. It was so unlike him to announcing his coming like that. In fact it rather reverse.

"Oh, Torajirou you're here as well." Yoshida is merely curious but cheerful to see Torajirou there. 

We all surprise at a stranger standing behind Yoshida, he dressed in western clothing, which did not earned our liking. Actually Hoshin looks rather offensive at the stranger, Hoshin is very traditional oriented. Yoshida started to notice the tension atmosphere and give a cough tried to get our attention but it did not work.

"Um, let me introduce this is Sugiyama Senwa. Sugiyama –san is a pupil of Ito sensei." Yoshida finally manage the introduction. It did not impressed neither Torajirou nor Hoshin, who still fuming. 

"Good afternoon, Sugiyama-san." Torajirou is the first to break the silent war.

After the introduction they all sit down to have cup of tea, Hoshin pretend to be pleasant but his speeches does not fool anyone. Occasion he brought up how nuisance the western culture lately affect the country. While Torajirou become more amuse at the Hoshin irritation and Sugiyama discomfort. 

I wanted to laugh at the situation but instead pulling Torajirou's sleeve to get his attention,

"Let break up this tension Torajirou, I wanted to play with Sugiyama. Ito-sensei taught him so he must have some skills." Torajirou agree immediately although I can see regret in his eyes. Torajirou humour is indeed beyond my comprehension sometime. 

He is good but not good enough, as I put down the stone. I look upon his face and saw it pale. His eyes shows fear staring at the stone I have just put down. However, he eyes narrow and with it comes determination, as I knew why Ito-san have take him under his wing. His determination inspired my fighting spirit; it has been along time since I really enjoyed a game. 

I win of course but he revives my love and the feeling of challenging of the game no matter who the opponent is. Torajirou felt this too; he was much attentive to Sugiyama after the game as if to said thank you. Before Sugiyama left, he challenges me an official game the next time we met. 

I am looking forward to that. Today I realize that I am ready returning to Edo and the other problem can wait for now, Go is my most priority. 

~~~~~~~ August 1841

On our way to Edo, we meet Mizuno-sama, who is Daimyo of Hamamatsu and a senior councillor at the time. He was on his way to request the central government that Tempo reform to carry out. Torajirou spent a great deal of time discussed the country situation, like Go I would never let it pass me by and for Torajirou it is political and economic. 

Torajirou argued with Mizuno-sama now, Torajirou did not raise his voice but like Hoshin his words shows the opposite affect that they indeed are duelling with words. I smile and knew it coming,

"There is no point of discussing further." Torajirou bow and excuse himself. 

I remembered before we leave Onomichi, Torajirou have a similar row with Lord Asano who is now viewing Torajirou as his grandchild. Torajirou feels that there is no point putting all the blame on moral, the crisis of the country was due to unstable political and economic as well. He very forceful disagreed when he realised that Lord Asano have encouraged his samurai to spread out and form peasant militia. The villagers have suffered enough without force to join an army. 

The problem with Torajirou is he feels too much and care too much, I realise sadly. 

~~~~~~~ November1841

It has been over two months and I struggle try not to remember why I wanted to leave Edo in the first place. Tried as I might to forget but those two faces is keep appear before my eyes. One of them is in front of me now. 

"Torajirou-chan, could you hold Kamesaburo just a few minutes. I'll go and get some foods for him. " Inari hand over her brother to Torajirou lap, 

"What a good boy you're." Torajirou cuddle the boy, while I watch over them happily until she comes back. Inari has been over to see Torajirou almost everyday bringing Kamesaburo with her. He is very good with children, as he had baby-sat the villagers' children before. 

"Ah there you are, Torajirou." Another voice that I wish to disappear but not as much as that girl. 

"Shuwa –sensei." Torajirou delight called out.

"Congratulation Torajirou, you've promoted to 2-dan." He beam a smile at Torajirou, 

"Thanks you." Torajirou looks at me waiting for my reaction but I was too busy fuming.

"Oh, Torajirou-chan 2-dan. Wow! I knew you could do it." Inari chip in, 

"Torajirou, could you come with me. There is something I wanted to talk to you about." Shuwa looks serious and turned to walk away without waiting to see of Torajirou coming or not. His action-raised mine frustration that I almost called out to stop Torajirou. It would confused Torajirou so I stop my childishness. 

~~~~ 

"What? You want me to change my name." Torajirou turn red, his name suits him well.

"Josaku-sensei agreed with me, actually he the one who suggests the name." Shuwa said quietly 

"Shusaku huh. I don't know. Could I think about it." Torajirou answer but he is distress at the news. It was honour to asked to change the name, as he is one of the best students. 

"Shusaku, Shusaku" he mumble the name and turn to me at last "What do you think Sai?" I give a smile indicate that whatever he think is the best. 

~~~~~ December 1843 

Shusaku is rise to four dan. The Go world began to see my strength and the potential that I will become but I still not very happy with the situation. I turn blind eyes to Torajirou relationship with other. Trying not to be too possessive of him, sometime I just leave him with the others because I could not bear the thought that he does not needs me. 

However, recently I notice the change in Torajirou and he looks haunted for some reason. I appeared outside of my goban and head toward him. I saw that he is crying silently, without further thought I took him into my arm and hold him. 

It was a while until he looks up and said,

"I needs to go home Sai. Mother is very sick and she may be dying." I nodded and comforted him in my arm.

TBC.

The next chapter will explain what happen to Torajirou. I'll write it through his POV. 

_The chapter is a bit of history-ish, I wanted to follow Hikaru no Go storyline. Sai did say that he met Mizuno-sama during one of his travel with Torajirou. The Tempo reform is a failure and Mizuno got kick out of his office in two years later after its implemented. _


	10. Chapter 9: Return to Onomichi

Chapter 9: Return to Onomichi 

My hand slowly touches my mother forehead hoping the temperature has come down. Her head twist away from my cool hand and a groan left her mouth. It has been days since my returned and she is getting worsen. My father still has not returns from his business trip and I wonder if he cares at all. 

My eyes barely keep open but I must stay awake a bit longer until Umeko taken over. Just a bit longer…

We were lying under the tree; my headrest is Shuwa lap while his arm grasp around my body. It was warm and sensuous dream. Shuwa eyes were warm with love and his mouth was approaching closer and closer…then the face was distorted to replace another face that I knew so well. 

 My eyes snapped open and I almost cried out loud. Umeko was sitting silently behind me, sewing next to the lamp.

"Umeko, how long have I been dozed off?" I asked embarrassed,

"Not long sir. I didn't have the heart to wake you up." She smiles at him. Umeko have been mother servant since the day she marriage my father. There was no doubt of her affection to my mother.

I nodded and said tiredly, "I'll see you later." As I slide the door quietly behind me. Sai was in my room wait for me. I felt my face turn hot and knew that I flushed at the memory of the dream. I turned away not wanting to talk to him and close my eyes to sleep. 

~~~~~ 3 months later

My mother is still sick and the doctor could not do anything. I am feeling frustrate not able to do anything, only watching her going into decline. I buried my head onto her bed as I sobbed for her and myself. I stopped when a hand stroke my head and look up to found that quiet smile of her. 

"It's alright Torajirou. I'll be better soon." She closes her eyes to drift back into her sleep.

I was still daze wonder if I just imagine it all, that was when Umeko open the door,

"Sir, your father is home." 

I felt the resentment and frustrated boiling inside, I snatch the door open and walk toward the study room.

That man sitting there, his wine is set on the table along with the financial book. He looks up at my glaring as his eyebrow rise up challenging me. My hand clutched tightly and I knew this have to be settle now,

"Is money so important to you than your own family?" my voice was low but it fills hate which is what I feeling at this moment,  

"You knew nothing. Go back to your books and Go, Torajirou." His attention once again backs to the financial book. 

I was busted with anger and ran toward the table to pick up the book from the table. 

"It you that does not understand, father." I scream and thrown the book down the floor.

Just that moment I realize what I has just done, the unbroken rule have break by me. I ran out the room quickly leaving my father to sat there bewilder. 

~~~~~~~ A week later

I still sulked in my room; the only time I went out is to visit my mother sickbed. I ignored Sai, still confused of what happen to my life. My room is my only hiding place from the world. I wishes that I dead, it the easiest way out. 

"Sir, there is someone here to see you." Senji said on the other side of the door,

"I'm not well, just tell whoever to come back another day." Shuffle the pillow to cover my head. 

"He said that his name is Ishigaya Kosaku." Senji continue ignored my request,

My eyes wide open with surprise, Ishigaya's here in Hiroshima. 

~~~~~ 

We walk slowly pace with Sai striding along, he seem glad to see Ishigaya. The sea breeze is bringing the rotten eggs smell that we decide to head toward Onomichi instead out to the beach nearby. 

"It's a surprise to see you here Ishigama." I finally talk after the greeting him in the house.

"My mother orders me to return to see my fiancé that they have arrange for me." Ishigama gives a nervous smile,

I was shock from the news and looks at him closely. He looks too young to settle down as if he knows what I was thinking he answers.

" I'm already 26 years old. I have been tried to put off marriage for years until my mother have enough and arrange this marriage last months." As I tried to adjust the information while he give me an odd smile,

"Kuwahara, I really appreciate that you'll attend my wedding."

"I don't know what to said, off course I'll be there. Congratulation!" I give him a bright beam smile,

"I glad that one of my friend will be there." He went on but I was stopped on my track.

"Did you asked the other disciples?" my nails digs into my palm afraid of the answer,

"Yes, before I leave Honinbo School but they unable to make it." Ishigama notice my pale face and said,

"Hey are you alright?" I look down the ground and think up an excuse   

"I've a headache" I hoping that he buys it and he did. It was like Ishigama and I smile at the knowledge that how well I knew him. 

"Umm, I just forget. Shuwa gives his greeting to you and your family. He hopes that you will return soon." 

I tried to calm down but it did not help. I need time to be alone and sort out my feeling.

"Ishigama, I'm not feeling well. Could I see you tomorrow in town." He looks at me strangely but agreed to my request. After he gone, Sai hoping around me and wonder what is wrong with me. I flushed and turn away. I need to get away from him. 

Sai is now sulking when I told him to leave me alone. I could not help it. I feel guilty to snapped at him but his present is causing me to confuse further.

 ~~~~~~~ (Flash back)

I put the stone down as usual while Sai whispered the move beside me. My eyes drift over his face and knew that he no longer with me. He is deeply concentrated at the game before them. His eyes fiercely gazed at his opponent that scare me and thrills me at the same time. I feel fluster and my heart beat faster. 

Then I turn to his opponent and surprised at the intense gaze looks at me. That same determination and passion in Sai eyes is in Shuwa eyes as well. I can see the same reflection as if they are each other mirror image. I looks down at the goban to see where Shuwa stone has place. My face is flushed at the memory of Shuwa intense gazed. Then sadness comes as I realize that it not me Shuwa looking at but Sai, the player and Sai return the feelings. I felt that I was alone, the one that left out. They are rival, not me just the mediator. I did not look up at Shuwa anymore feeling ashamed. At last the game was over, Sai lost again but he is improving so is Shuwa skills.   

"I going to have a rest in my goban." He said and disappears leaving me alone again. He had done that for months now.

I wonder why? Did he bore with my company? I was too afraid to ask and ignored the pained in my heart. I feel alone again like the times before Sai had come into my live.

"Shusaku, it a great game." Shuwa voice breaks the silence room; I notice that everyone has left for sometime. I look down at the game and put the stone back in the tray.

"You're disappointed at the game." Shuwa mistake for my quietness before I shake my head he continues,

"It thrills me to play games with you, Shusaku. We may be sensei and student to the world but I consider you as my true rival." He words sadden me more. Sai! 

Sai thinks the same about Shuwa. He properly loves Shuwa more than me. My hand clutched to the stone tray harder wanted the loneliness to go away. Shuwa palm is place on top of my hand that I look up and amaze that he is beside me. 

The sudden auras of strong sexuality that seem to emanate from Shuwa freeze me. My eyes widen and my lips parted in bewilderment. Before the knowledge shank in, he had bent his head and trapped my mouth in a kiss. His lip was cool and firm and I started to felt a strange reaction of my body quite unaccountable. 

 After he let go of me. I was lost to comprehend what has happen. 

"I'm sorry that I had shock you but I'm not sorry for the kiss." And disappeared out the room. 

When I was back to reality, I was afraid for the first time in my lives. Yet, the kiss has take away the loneliness. Shuwa did not touch me again after that faithful day but his warmth eyes always on me. 

~~~~~~ 

I look at the goban where Sai is hiding himself. Nothings have resolved and an erotic dream every night does not help either. I knew why I have dreamed of Shuwa but why did Sai also appear in it? What did I feels any way? I pull myself together trying to forget, hopping everything is a nightmare.

TBC.

History states that Shusaku is a perfect filial son and pupil… 

When I read of Shusaku I wonder if he had any flaws at all. He is bloody too perfect to be human. I think that the history just exaggeration so I wrote the confrontation scene with his father above to let him become more human, in my eyes at least. I didn't over dramatic his action because he is after all a traditional Japanese. 

If you wonder if it's a yaoi story then not really...nothing beyond a kiss. I reads yaoi too but to write one is beyond my capacity. I do understand love and other human emotions so I don't care what other do as long it real love. I one of those fool.    


End file.
